Sat in on the Hasan hearing today. For those of you who don’t know who Nidal Hasan is…google his name…Anyhow it was creepy and odd at the same time. I have never been close to someone who killed anyone…let alone killed a bunch of innocent Soldiers.
He had a beard…I found it made him look like a terrorist more than he already is…the judge postponed the hearing saying “he was causing a disruption in the court room.”
I have followed this case since the beginning whereas I’m at Fort Hood and I have a little involvement PAO wise with this. I don’t think in all my 34 grand years I have ever felt sicker to my stomach, breaking out in cold sweat, hair on the back of my neck standing up than today.
It’s an eerie feeling seeing someone who is so evil…Because cameras aren’t allowed in the court room there is no way of describing what this man looks like…Very thin and frail. Balding with a terrorist type beard…He looks sickly but not sickly where you would have sympathetic…or at least I didn’t….it was a very perplexing moment of all my days in the Army.
Moving on.
So, I must find humor that tonight was a big PAO shindig at a bar…nobody extended the invite to the recovering addict. Go figure right 🙂 lol.
I miss the BF today…I’m unsure why I do but I do. I should be happy with my life. I am obviously not on the pink cloud of sobriety anymore…I feel alone. I am lonely. Keeping myself busy is not working.my house is quiet. I have no real purpose except to work.
I want a dog…something to keep me company. But I know right now I just can’t add an animal in my life. I really want both my dogs back…I sort of just want to go break in his house and steal them back. But deep down I know that’s the wrong answer.
we start our staff exercise tomorrow…basically the next 2 weeks is going to suck. I’m tired. I really need time to just relax.
until next time
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