You can spend minutes, hours, days, weeks, or even months over-analyzing a situation; trying to put the pieces together, justifying what could’ve, would’ve happened… or you can just leave the pieces on the floor and move the fuck on.
So, he and I broke up or maybe we already were who knows? This time for good! Fuck He who gets off wanting to fuck a transvestite! In 39 years, I’ve never met such an asshole narcissistic controlling man as him. I should have left when he had sex with some woman while we were “broken” up or maybe after multiple times of calling me a whore or when he pushed me down hard enough where I thought my kneecap was broke but I didn’t.
He wanted control so much in fact he asked me to be “submissive” our relationship defines every trait of narcissistic but this I’m taking control of having my life back from an alcoholic narcissistic jerk! A blog I posted a few days ago reads this “I don’t understand why he does this know how much it pains me. It makes me an emotional wreck, consuming me to the core. It breaks my heart; I love this man so much. Why is beyond me because he is horrible to me. It’s the back and forth.
Complete narcissism and somehow, I feel it’s my fault. I did nothing this time. one time though He broke up with me Somehow, he thought the bathroom door was locked and freaked out. He walked out of my house and completely ignoring me. He knows I hate that but does it. Another time, the time he pushed me down, I didn’t go to yoga.
Was it all bad absolutely not but I simply will not be with a man who verbally, emotionally or physically abused me and that is him. I fell in love with someone he wasn’t so shame on me.
He lied; he has lied to me about everything. Telling me he had to install carpet after going to out of state for a month. And then he slips up and tells me the same house has all wood floors
The constant I love you, I don’t love you and the back and forth. Then professing his undying love for me.
Calling me a whore and the constant belittling me, I don’t deserve that. I have stuck by him throughout his entire transition, at times when he has put me in tears, calling me names accusing me of cheating when he has been up in Missouri fucking around and telling me I can’t be with anyone else.
I mean stupid lies, that he couldn’t stay with his friend but had to go camping, my friend lives there, she saw him at the bar. I have pictures.
I knew he was lying from the start, all over the carpet.
He had sex with some girl a while ago, blamed me because I was mean to him. I just had surgery.
It is lways my fault, never his. This time we are done, I have a date tonight with my trainer and I should have gone out with him when I met him in March, but of course I turn down the nice guys for jerks who don’t deserve me.
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